Category Archives: New Beginnings

365 Day Blog challenge Day 16: part 2 – when the feel like the world is against you #365daychallenge

I’ve already posted one blog for today but felt this carried on. Yesterday was blue monday and it wasn’t so much that it was a sad day it just brought a load of crap with it and quite frankly by the time I got home I had had enough. I had been sworn at when trying to keep the peace in a situation, then for staring in the wrong direction, someone quite clearly had a crisis of conscience. Then life stuff got in the way and I felt like giving up.

When I was younger (yes I’m thinking about the past again) we always had to deal with my father’s moods and there would be months on end when there was tension in the house because he had decided to sulk over something stupid. Anyway this got me into a habit of believing that when everything was good and going well something really bad was coming around the corner. Years ago when I left home I had managed to overcome this and just got on with life, but looking back I often see how I reacted to situations was because of this issue. I sometimes felt like I was owed by the world and then it would turn round and say no, don’t be so stupid.

I feel like I am going in circles again at the moment. I’m doing my best to create a life for myself with what I have but it feels like hurdles keep getting put in my way and again I’m beginning to wonder what I did wrong or what I need to do to put it right. The world is changing so much that we are slowly becoming robots. We no longer know how to communicate properly, we all believe our problems are worse than others or people tell you ‘to just get on with it‘. without realising we are all different and although we have the same equipment to use – arms legs brain etc, it somehow works completely different to everyone else and god forbid you should be different and not conform.

All I want to do, is live life, things aren’t what I thought they would be but I’m happy to work with what I have. But for some reason blocks have been put in my path and I really don’t know what to do anymore. Yes I do. I must remember to just breathe, ask for help and hope for the best. As that seems like all I can do right now along with singing the song below.

And remember …….

Hakuna Matata! What a wonderful phrase

Hakuna Matata! Ain't no passing craze

It means no worries for the rest of your days

It's our problem-free philosophy

Hakuna Matata!

Hakuna Matata?

Yeah. It's our motto!

What's a motto?

Nothing. What's a-motto with you?

Those two words will solve all your problems

To think this was 1994!!!!

Thank you for reading

xxx


		
Advertisements

365 Day Blog challenge Day 16: Heads,shoulders,knees and toes #365daychallenge

Head, shoulders, knees and toes,
Knees and toes.

Head, shoulders, knees and toes,
Knees and toes.

And eyes, and ears, and mouth,
And nose.

Head, shoulders, knees and toes,

On Saturday at the coffee shop a friend said she could feel tension in her shoulders after trying a bit of running on the 5k. I had this problem when running that my shoulders were always high, the tension building up and after a race it stayed there, but then I found when I was stressed, that is where I hold it and I need to remember to release it and as my friend said ‘bring your shoulders down’. Funny thing is it’s the hardest thing to do.You can sense it’s there but trying to release it feels in possible. When I get stressed I also forget to breathe and find myself trying to refocus and concentrate on my breathing.

Hence why I got my first tattoo last year on my ankle that says ‘just breathe’ yet I still forget about it. It was supposed to remind me in times of stress to just breathe and everything will be ok.

DSC_0008

‘Stress that continues without relief can lead to a condition called distress, a negative stress reaction. Distress can lead to physical problems including headaches, upset stomach, elevated blood pressure, chest pain and trouble sleeping. Research suggests that stress can also bring on or worsen certain symptoms or diseases.’ source

I’ve found a really good site via FB which has some handy tips, just follow this link

It’s amazing how stress regardless of what it is can affect our bodies. And with so much information and pressure put on us these days we need to find a vice that works to keep us calm. I’m still looking. Fingers crossed I’ll find it one day.

 Thank you for reading

xxx

anigif_sub-buzz-30622-1504645750-15.gif
‘”Reading a book always works for me because it helps distract my brain and mentally takes me to another place. Reading has been my safe haven for years so I always keep a book with me anywhere I go and read EVERY day.”‘ link

365 Day Blog challenge Day6: Bring me sunshine #365daychallenge

Day 6

 

I feel like my own worst enemy at the moment. I’m struggling to cope with the new year, a lot of changes and a tight budget. This week has left me exhausted. This morning I was awake from 4am because of the rain and just could not go back to sleep. I ended up driving myself insane that I decided to go early to Morley. I was meeting a friend for lunch there as a new cafe was opening and I thought I would take myself off for breakfast and went to Greggs for a sandwich. I then went for a wander around the town until I got tired and went to the new cafe early and sat with a latte and played on my phone.

This year is all about taking things more slowly and making memories by focusing on experiences rather than buying objects/things to make me feel better. In other words live life. So for me it’s getting back into volunteering at parkrun. To build up my fitness and get running again but not big races. For me that’s next year. In 2019 I want to do the Norwich 10k or half marathon followed by the Great North Run. But for this year it’s all about taking a step back and resting and visiting more places and hopefully making  a better life for myself.

Today happened because I was meeting a friend who wanted to try a new local cafe and also because something my cousin said to me after we were discussing where we live, him in Manchester me in Leeds. And I said I felt I didn’t know the place anymore as it has developed so much. I worked at the top of town for years and never really came down into town much and it’s changed so much. He said just go off and explore, take yourself off for a walk and see where it ends up. I think that’s what happened today and I saw so much more of Morley. And the best bit is? I hardly spent any money. What with the discount fayre on my phone, breakfast, two coffees, lunch  and a book from the charity shop, oh and some birthday cards I think I spent £15 and was out for about 4-5 hours.

gratitude_list

Lately songs or words from songs keep getting stuck in my head and before I got to Morley, Bring me sunshine popped up and then I came across Ernie Wise’s statue, which I completely forgot about. It’s like Bishop Auckland has a statue of Stan Laurel (see here) Big names from small places. We all have to start somewhere and sometimes restarting from scratch can teach us some lessons. I just need to remember to keep taking it slowly and stop stressing myself out over pointless things. 2018 has a lot going for it. Just need to communicate more, enjoy life and take it day by day.

Bring me sunshine in your smile
Bring me laughter all the while
In this world where we live
There should be more happiness
So much joy you can give
To each brand new bright tomorrow

 

And as I write this, this song below came on tv and struck a chord and I just don’t know why.

Paolo Nutini – Last Request

Grant my last request and just let me hold you
Don’t shrug your shoulders, lay down beside me
And sure I can accept that we’re going nowhere
But one last time let’s go there, lay down beside me
Yeah, lay down beside me

http://

 Thank you for reading.
xxx

365 Day Blog challenge Day5 : splurging or binge eating when stressed #365daychallenge

Day 5

So it’s been a long week, and I’m sat at home and a bit worried about life in general. Because it’s been a long day and I’m now sat on the sofa and have eaten cake, which I haven’t had for a while and wondering what else to eat to calm me down I’ve reacted by doing the other stress releasing thing and that’s wanting to spend money.

My instant reaction was to go online and spend money. Buy loads of books or dvd’s. I’m not keen on clothes online as I have a funny body shape and prefer going to the shop to try stuff on. I’ve recently lost a stone and most of my clothes dont’ fit as well now. So like my trousers, where I always have trouble getting past my thighs, aren’t so bad but my waist area ends up with a mass amount of excess material. Not always a good luck.

Anyway, I’ve been feling slightly sorry for myself today, and tried to explain to a colleague how I was feeling and basically got a lecture about how worse off others were and how they seemed to cope. Well I’m not them and although I say good for them, I’m still struggling and taking baby steps. I will get to where I need to be but in my own time. Hence the reaction of me wanting to spend money. Instead I distracted myself. I checked my emails and then text my friend and decided instead of staying in tomorrow I will get myself out and go treat myself, even if it’s just something simple as the bus ride and a coffee.

I need to do something for me that I can look forward to instead of this instant gratification of buying or eating stuff and then regretting it later. I am actually quite proud of myself.

2018 is about doing things differently and so far so good. Lets hope I can do like I did tonight and spot the signs and avert disaster. Hope you all have a good weekend.

Thank you for reading

xxx

365 Day Blog challenge Day4: I never knew how important it was to love yourself #365daychallenge

Over a year ago I started thinking about how to look after myself, how to see the positive in things. I started a stress class to help with the anxiety I was having. I repelled negativity to a point I hated being around anyone who would moan and tried to avoid it. But I couldn’t avoid my own thinking and I think that led to what happened in 2017.

So I’ve picked myself up, dusted myself down, only thing is it’s a slow process, more than I expected, but I feel better for it.

I’m currently sat on my living room floor with music blasting from the laptop and every song on the playlist (it’s currently on shuffle) seems to be telling me something. So I’m singing my heart out and having a fun time before I have to start tidying the kitchen and make some tea.

Listen baby, ain’t no mountain high,
Ain’t no valley low, ain’t no river wide enough baby
If you need me call me, no matter where you are,
No matter how far; don’t worry baby
Just call my name; I’ll be there in a hurry
You don’t have to worry.

You’ve got the music in you
Don’t let go
You’ve got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don’t give up
You’ve got a reason to live
Can’t forget

Thank you for reading

xxx

365 Day Blog challenge Day 3 – Earworm #365daychallenge

Day 3 of 2018 and it’s been a big day, a fresh start. Recently I have had one of Michael Jackson’s songs stuck in my head. I had a bad day one day last month and all of a sudden a line from the song popped in my head telling me it was ok. A few days later a similar thing happened. So I repeated the words and if by magic I was calm.

I understand songs have a particular meaning behind them when written but for me these words seem to come at the right time. Regardless of it’s real meaning it worked for me. Plus I’m always getting song lyrics mixed up. But what I found recently was that I just couldn’t listen to any music until this happened.

 

Annie, are you okay?
So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
Annie, are you okay?
So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
Annie, are you okay?
So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
Annie, are you okay?
So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?

I was introduced to pop music when young by an Aunt, and then some rock music. I grew to love Bon Jovi and was lucky enough to see them at one of the last Wembley gigs before the stadium was destroyed. I also saw Toploader then but was too busy doing a mexican wave to take notice until a year later and dancing in the moonlight became a big hit and then I got to see them in Derby Assembley rooms.

What I love about music these days is that we now have more access. For example apart from the radio we also have online services where we can use playlists and explore music we wouldn’t even dream of listening to. I am always up for being introduced to new things and have discovered some great music. But most of all it’s what we get from it ourselves regardless of our tastes.

So what do you like listening to? and what earwoms have you had recently?

Thank you for reading

xxx

365 Day Blog challenge Day 2 – Gratitude #365daychallenge

I’ve always appreciated the little things. But more so recently. Like my friends spending time chatting over a coffee. Sat watching films with my family. To have a job. To have a home. To have choices.
Gratitude
noun

The quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful:

He expressed his gratitude to everyone on the staff.
2017 has shown me how the little things can be the most precious memory/experince that we could hope for. When times are tough it’s the little things that can make a big difference. Like saying hello to a stranger. To be able to lie in bed and read and be dry and warm. To be able to talk to someone when you are struggling or just because you want to try a new coffee shop or life has been so busy you want to stop and refocus.
When you find yourself in a bad situation ask:
What can I learn? When I look back on this,
without emotion, what will I be grateful for?
gratitude-barry-neil-kaufman-quotes-sayings-pictures.jpg
When we are at our lowest, we always find the phrase ‘there’s someone worse off then you in the world’ and at times there are, but in that moment you don’t want to think about that. But in recent months I’ve realsied how lucky I am. Life hasn’t turned out how I expected and yet, in one way I’m grateful. I have so much more than I could have ever have hoped for and that’s what 2017 showed me in a round about way.
So whenever you are having a bad day or times are tough, try thinking about what you are grateful for and rememeber to smile. Things won’t always change in an instant but you’ll always have these moments when you can say
‘it is what is and I’ll deal with it the best I can.’
I’m a bad one for trying to make things perfect, but I am learning to accept that sometimes it just doesn’t happen that way and sometimes that’s just what we need. So rememmber to be grateful, even for the little things.
Thank you for reading
xxx

365 Day Blog challenge Day 1 – Looking for a positive change #365daychallenge

The inspiration for this challenge is from my friend Kirsty. Check out her blog here

22490051_10156633316844186_5010222522028255840_n

Happy New Year!

Another year is upon us. 2017 was quite a year for me and when I posted the photo above on Facebook a few months back I wasn’t expecting it to come true in a way.

Anyway that’s the past and as usual I am finding it hard to let go. Christmas was a difficult time for me. It was for my family to. But as I am learning it is how we respond to things. I have to be honest I don’t think I handled things very well and I am not proud of myself. Since then and lots of thinking and chats with family and friends I’m realising I’ve been to hard on myself and hope others forgive me.

I’ve said it before, human beings are funny things. They put high expectations on themselves and expect this from others to, instead of realising that although we may have the same outer shell bar being male or female, we are all individually unique. I have never felt like I’ve fitted in. Always the square peg shoving herself through a round hole and repeatedly making the same mistakes and going over and over the past like it’s going to change everything.

For so long I have believed I would only ever be good enough if I was married to someone, had a family, a house etc. That the whole struggle through school, and being told I was never good enough to actually get myself through college and then university, without the second thought that I was leaving the safety of my own family to quickly finding after 16 years of sharing a bedroom,  I was suddenly alone in my own bedroom, in a house full of people and I had no one to look after but myself. Such a scary thought. Today I feel I have come full circle in a way except now I live on my own, and to avoid the loneliness, up until recently I was always finding ways to avoid being alone. So joining book club, working as many hours as possible, going to the gym, inviting people to stay or going to stay with friends. These last few weeks I’ve been hiding from everyone or trying to. Finding it really difficult to leave the house, sometimes down to not having the strength to leave the house to having a full on mental block.

But its taught me some valuable lessons and although I’m still trying to charge round everywhere, I have to sometimes remind myself I can’t do things as quick as I used to that, it’s ok to sit and do nothing for hours on end. My sleeping pattern has been broken and I sometimes find myself asleep by 9pm and awake by 4am and not being able to sleep for longer or I end up staying in bed and continue with broken sleep. Then there’s the eating. I’ve completely lost my appetite lately and I have to remind myself to eat. It’s crazy how quickly things can change.

That’s why I have been so grateful for the support of my friends and family. 2017 was clearly sent to test me, and test me it did. What I need to focus on now in 2018 is what I achieved in 2017. I did parkrun tourism, a half marathon. Struggled with employment. Tried to sort my health out and looked at fitness and diet. But most of all it showed me that there’s something about me that people have shown their love and support I’ve and it’s been amazing.

So here’s to a new year and new challenges and a new adventure.

And for a random thought, here’s an interesting article on changing the way we think here

Thank you for reading

xxx

Book Club – Leeds

Source: Book Club – Leeds

Book Club (Louise Hay – You can heal your life)

As well as specialising in things holistic and complimentary we at New Beginnings at one time hosted the book club on the now sadly closed South Leeds Community radio station. We’ve decided to bring back the book club but from the more accessible Costa coffee on Briggate, Leeds
As we are all about positivity and healing the new book club will be for those who wish to read spiritual books (not necessary religion though), self help books, other general positive works and no doubt throwing in our favourite decluttering books to chat about. The choices are endlessTo start with we will be discussing Louise Hay – You can heal your life
Good reads blurb: Louise’s key message in this powerful work is: “If we are willing to do the mental work, almost anything can be healed.” Louise explains how limiting beliefs and ideas are often the cause of illness, and how you can change your thinking…and improve the quality of your life.Don’t worry if you don’t get chance to read it, please still come along and join the discussion. We also invite you to bring a choice for the next club and be a part of the forward planning discussion. Appreciating not everyone works Mon-Fri & 9-5 we thought this could be an evolving event where we can choose dates between us dependent on the best work patterns and also change venues whenever we feel like it. Maybe in August we could meet in the park & bring picnics?? We want the events to be as inclusive as possible. Everyone has something to share and bring to the chat.
If you are coming along please drop us a line on the facebook event