Today Is my day. My shifts keep changing around at work so I planned today to sort the house and clean it and do what I wanted. When I got up it was raining, of course its bank holiday. Then I thought even better, lets get the house sorted this morning then this afternoon can be a PJ day and I can sort the blogs and get some reading done.
I also realised I’d only have enough milk for 3 coffees and couldn’t be bothered to go out (first world problems?) I think I’ve drank too much lately, I believe my blood is now made of coffee. probably why my arm is taking a while to heal from accidentally burning my self on a tray.
I keep saying this but 2014 has been very bizarre. Funniest thing is in about two months time I will have been living on my own for four years. FOUR YEARS!!! And its took all that time to actually feel comfortable in my own skin and finally feel like its home. For the past year I have wanted to move and now I feel like I’ve settled I really don’t want to. Even if the house is too big I have everything the way I want it. But I would like to not live in a back to back. lets hope the prices don’t suddenly rocket as I love the space at the moment. (fingers crossed I don’t jinx myself)
So is anyone else having a bizarre year? Anyone treating themselves to a PJ day? If so what do you like to do?
Just clearing out today and now onto the laptop and found this that I wrote from a 2 day writing/radio production course over 18 months ago
Beautiful sunny March morning, the sky is a rich sea blue. Walking up the cobbled streets filled with
quaint little shops, around the corner I suddenly see the Church, tall and proud, with open arms for
everyone and anyone who approaches. This mighty structure, will not judge, will not frown. It’s a
place of sanctuary for every living soul.
Further along the path to the entrance I see people snapping away on their cameras taking pictures,
recording rememorable moments. Walking past them to the church doors, I find something on the
door. It’s the Sanctuary knocker. It is fierce, mighty and important. Its duty is to test the strength of
those seeking sanctuary for all those needing a sense of peace. I try to remember that this building
was once somebody’s vision. This building was someone’s achievement. This building is a gift we all
Our lives are filled with noise, music, television, people talking, traffic moving, children crying,
headphones raging. It’s hard to take time and sit in silence for a little while. We forget we need a
sense of peace. A sense of togetherness. Funny, how when we walk into a place of worship,
regardless of religion we all become one. We become silent, we become equal. We do not judge, we
do not scorn, we embrace the silence, we embrace the beauty. The power of the building has a hold
on us. It allows us to sit, to kneel, to stand alone or together. Our voices are hushed. We sing a loud
chorus. We stand alone. We stand proud. We stand together.
We should learn from this building and remember we are not alone. It is easy for us to feel like that
and forget we’re only human. We need to come together, not just for Birthdays or Christmas; but
every once in a while just to remember who we are and why we should unite.
Recently I’ve been really busy and had loads to sort out and haven’t been in touch with or seen people in ages and so much has happened that I have felt guilty life has got in the way.
Yesterday a good friend said ‘You know where I am if you want a coffee’ after I apologised for going quiet for a bit. I haven’t stopped and I miss doing things like sitting and reading a book but I’ve felt so guilty sitting still when there’s CV’s to be sent and application after application as long as your arm to go through.
I think that’s why I’ve been so eager to house sit while I can because it gives me a chance to get away from my house (which I realise now is very dark and dingy compared to other peoples homes, fault of a back to back) and that I really don’t like being there. I now know what to look for when I look for a new home. Preferably a place with two entrances and perhaps a small garden or somewhere near a park or field.
“Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .””
— C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves)
“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
— Elbert Hubbard
“Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.”
— Mark Twain
“Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”
— A.A. Milne
“Why did you do all this for me?’ he asked. ‘I don’t deserve it. I’ve never done anything for you.’ ‘You have been my friend,’ replied Charlotte. ‘That in itself is a tremendous thing.”
— E.B. White (Charlotte’s Web)
“I think if I’ve learned anything about friendship, it’s to hang in, stay connected, fight for them, and let them fight for you. Don’t walk away, don’t be distracted, don’t be too busy or tired, don’t take them for granted. Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together. Powerful stuff.”
— Jon Katz
“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch?”
— A.A. Milne (Winnie-the-Pooh)
So thank you to all my friends, however long I’ve known you for I love you all, I may have treated you badly and I’m sorry if I have but sometimes I haven’t felt like the Helen you all know and love and I’m thankful for your love and support.
The first half of 2014 has been quite a roller-coaster ride. I’m now in my third job of the year. Lets hope this one works out.
I finally got benefits from the job centre after filling in the wrong form to now being told that due to an error in tax code that they didn’t have right I have to pay some back. Hurrah!!!!!
A lesson for the future perhaps, one I didn’t learn the last time I become unemployed either which was to have back up savings. Only problem is my expenses are to high and I’ve cut back the best I can that savings are very scarce. But I have my health, good family and friend support, and of course book club.
Recently my sister bought me the murder she wrote series 1 for the hard work I put in for job hunting and landing a job. not this one another which I turned down due to an advert saying 40 hours only to be a zero hour contract. That is not a way to live.
All companies these days seem to want to offer contracts up to 25 hours but expect you to work up to 40. Then when there is no hours drop you down again. How did it ever come to this?
I know part of it is my fault for having so many bills etc and not being able to take these are taking two jobs at a time like most people do but all I wanted was something to help me still dot he things I loved. It wasn’t for the want of trying to finally get something. I had a really bad interview and apparently flexible is not we can allow you to do things its we will give you a week of early s and a week of lates etc also our security guard will take your pass off you before you’ve even reached the bottom of the stairs and the interviewer has said goodbye. bloody charming. Funny thing was I was on the bus home and saw an advert in a shop window, got home and sent CV off two hours later got a call and initial interview for a few days later and hey presto here I am happy as a sandbag watching diagnosis murder and Dick Van Dyke in drag and also playing 5 other characters (his cousins). 😀
My next big task is to try and finish the on going project of operation move house. I saw at 5am this morning House Doctor and how the house was to big for the couple and they had filled every corner some of it with stuffed animals. Apparently whatever space you are in you fill it, and I have with this and there’s only me. last clear out I got rid of furniture and bags and bags of stuff. There’s at least 7 bags downstairs ready to go. I’m trying to find what’s really important and how I can get rid of two rooms of crap. Also I need to stop shopping for two people or when I’m hungry, its a bad habit. I’ve now got a full fridge and likely to go out of date before I can eat it. Eyes bigger than my belly.
So count your blessings, save your pennies, take time out to read a book, join a club, speak to friends and family often, lend a hand, sing your heart out and most of all eat cake.