Time changes everyone

A mish mash of my week, or what I can remember anyway

Yet we forget them some get left behind. Humans are funny people. Some move forward, some get stuck in a perpetual loop and need a little push. Or if they do break free and bec

Sleep like a starfish

Merida: There are those who say that fate is something beyond our command. That our destinies are not our own. But I know better. Our fate lives within us. You only have to be brave enough to see it.

 Reconciliation comes from setting aside pride, admitting your mistakes, and forgiving completely

see link below for what this film can teach us
see link below for what this film can teach us

Lion king lessons 

Don’t stop believing!

Other than that just give up on trying to get people to listen. Funny I should say that as I haven’t been a good one. But that’s because I am scared of other people having problems and I wouldn’t be able to help them. I have not made the best of this ‘being single’ malarcky. I shouldn’t be thinking about it, I haven’t but it’s 3 years since Tw*t-face broke my heart.

It’s my day off and I can’t relax. Yesterday was horrible. Too much to do and by time we were finished, I hadn’t realised the time and while everyone left I sat on the cupboard and cried. I hadn’t eaten all day apart from two packs of munchies, and because of that I had a dizzy spell and thought I was going to faint. As usual young Jenny came back from unloading the rubbish and looked after me. I hate hormones. I need to start eating properly again to get the balance back.

I was going to my friend Caroline’s and had nearly called off at the last minute but was so glad I didn’t. It’s good to see how far she has come and what an amazing cook! I had some of the cake she made for breakfast with a coffee 🙂 It’s funny, everyone thinks you need to show others how much you care by spending loads of money. You really don’t. Just a few drinks (diet cola for me and lots of food and chatting. And yes Jane I did listen once they got a word in :). And Caroline and Steff told me what to be eating as well 🙂 I may have to make excuses and go over more often.

It’s funny how time can change people. Granted it doesn’t change some, aka my Dad. I have been through things these last few years that I’ve never thought possible. And now some people can’t forgive me for trying to get back on track after things that have been said or have done which I’ve regretted and now look at me as if I’m dirt. If they would let me talk to them, they’d know that I’ve been trying to tell them for months was really something important, but of course I’m Helen I’m mean’t to be trodden on.

You can’t change the past you can’t take back how you reacted, you can’t take back what you said, and if people aren’t willing to stick by you then perhaps its time to move on. It’s really sad to know people come in and out of your life. That relationships get broken and can’t be mended. It’s a shame people don’t talk face to face any more and rely on texts/emails to get across the message. Believe me it’s not pleasant. I admit I’ve ranted a few times myself, but have refused to do it any more. If it’s important ring me,  my sister does it everyday and I really like the fact she feels she can do this, or come and see me. I hate texting when it’s important I also hate when people use the phones while sitting with me because that’s was the ex was doing and turns out he was talking to his ‘new love’. I’ve tried telling people it’s not them I don’t trust it just makes me uneasy and now it’s their turn, and I will listen however much it hurts.

Gallery of stuff from FB.

Keep your head up; you are so much better than you believe… I promise!

Don’t judge. Behind every person, there’s always a reason why they are the way they are.

Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated. -Confucius

Surround yourself with positive people who will support you during your bad days, not just your good days.

Twitter: 

@minionsinmyhead8m I mispronounced #NeilGaiman’s name on the phone n Helen @isfromupnorth thought I said Neil Diamond. Okaaay then…

OMG! why does bad tv suck you in??? Years ago it was Sunset Beach on channel5 (that’s a whole other blog) I’m sat glued to Once Upon a Time again on Channel5. and I’m positively glued. I love anything to do with magic or odd worlds, like Willow, Harry Potter, Practical Magic (I’m currently reading the book) and The chronicles of Narnia and I now have the BBC boxset. squeeellllssssss!!!

Today I started clearing out stuff, again, but this time I thought I’d clear stuff out belonging tot he time I lived with my ex. It’s been 3 years now and I keep finding little things that trigger memories and I just have to get rid, for a fresh start, again. I went into TK Maxx to day and had to walk out again as it reminded me of him and made me feel sick. I know it sounds stupid, but I’ve been at a low point recently and feel susceptible to these things and also stressful situations aren’t helping. I hadn’t even thought about him until all this kicked off with my Dad and I had a visit up north and was told things I had blocked out. Weird that.

So into the charity bag went some stuff I had bought years ago which I hadn’t used for a while but could remember when I got it, and in it went.  I also smashed up two cups and what fun that was. On Thursday some bags and furniture will be collected for charity and what a relief that would be. I don’t think I sorted through stuff when I first left and then moved twice and then just kept adding. Mainly because I am in a large house and you can fill rooms quite quickly when things are ‘out of sight, out of mind’ you forget their there and then one day you have to face them. It’s now a big a struggle as it was back then.

So my advice to you. Don’t shut down, don’t shut the world out because you think you’re doing someone a favour. Don’t let things build up and build up because like me you’ll end up with many demons who will keep coming back and biting you firmly in your squishy arse.

and on that note I leave you as I sit in shock at the ending of Once Upon a Time. *shocked face*

Thank you for reading

xxx

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