‘Find me somebody to love’ & who loves me for me in return

‘Everyday – I try and I try and I try – 
But everybody wants to put me down 
They say I’m goin’ crazy 
They say I got a lot of water in my brain 
Got no common sense 
I got nobody left to believe 
Yeah – yeah yeah yeah 

Oh Lord 
Somebody – somebody 
Can anybody find me somebody to love? 

Got no feel, I got no rhythm 
I just keep losing my beat 
I’m ok, I’m alright 
Ain’t gonna face no defeat 
I just gotta get out of this prison cell 
Someday I’m gonna be free, Lord! 

Find me somebody to love 
Can anybody find me somebody to love? ‘

Queen – Somebody to love.

My Starsign(s)

Aquarius -Traditional, Aquarian Traits, Friendly and humanitarian, Honest and loyal,Original and inventive, Independent and intellectual. Bad Points-Intractable and contrary, Perverse and unpredictable, Unemotional and detached

Capricorn – Practical and prudent, Ambitious and disciplined, Patient and careful, Humorous and reserved. Bad points- Pessimistic and fatalistic,Miserly and grudging.

How Emotions effect our everyday workings:

(from the web)

How emotions effect what we decide 

http://www.searchengineworkshops.com/articles/stop-exploiting-emotions1.html

Emotion is often associated and considered reciprocally influential withmood, temperament, personality, disposition, and motivation, as well as influenced by hormones and neurotransmitters such asdopamine, noradrenaline, serotonin, oxytocin and cortisol. Emotion is often the driving force behind motivation, positive or negative.

Emotion- A mental state that does not arise through free will, and that and is often accompanied by physiological changes’

“Loneliness can also be empowering – teaching you the things you appreciate about yourself and the things you have to offer someone else.”

Interesting bloghttp://bipolarbear.co.nz/2012/09/26/lessons-in-loneliness/

Image
What we can feel at any moment
(from the web)

The reason for this blog is because I’m trying to understand why I feel like everything is crashing down around me. It’s not. things are still as they are. My house is a mess which is probably one thing niggling at me. I’ve been dealing with some news lately that I’ve not been able to handle & really didn’t know who to share with. My biggest, biggest problem is I don’t know how to sort things out that are going through my head unless I can talk to someone or go for a run. But at the moment I don’t, I can’t do one due to my bad knees and the other seems impossible. And now I keep crumbling into a mess and I really don’t know what to do. antidepressants are not the answer. I did that when I was 20 and for me it just numbed me. My problem at the moment is I feel like I’ve taken twenty steps back to two years ago. I ended up on my own and felt lost. I’m 32 and I’m not where I want to be or should be. The only secure thing is my job/career. My main love (apart from Colin Firth,running,cake and books oh and driving if I get back to it) is my job. I just love being creative and people relying on little old me to create a t-shirt of mug for their office desk.  I’m scared and lonely. Living on your own isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. it took me ages to accept it and realise no one else was in the house. (think it’s why I hate back-to-backs now, always noises). It’s hard work. there’s the up-keep of the house. The bills!! The shopping. and the chuffing washing up! I know I’m not alone and other people live on their own and cope, but I’m always better when surrounded by people. Or I think I am, I feel more relaxed. I don’t know a time where I haven’t lived in a house full of people.

I feel so mixed up at the moment. This weather is doing my nut in. It’s almost three weeks since my knee was seen to and then I hurt my back. But my body seems to be getting worse due to the weather. I hate pain. I have a low pain threshold. I feel like a big crybaby. So much has changed this year and I’ve not been able to accept it. My brain decides it’s going to do it’s safety trigger and and just switch off my memory in times of stress. I was fine before two years ago and now when I get worked up over anything I forget stuff instantly, I can put something down and forget what I’ve done. It’s mental!

The reason for the star sign information is because I’ve been working out who I am and what I’m like and what ‘outside forces’ effect us. I am classed as an Aquarian but apparently I’m on the cusp of Capricorn. When I (rarely) read the Capricorn and Aquarian starsigns it’s spooky how true they can be to how I’m feeling. Sometimes I try to do it at the end of the day to see if it’s true. Because things can get in your subconscious and effect how/who you are, it effects your emotions.  Like when you’re growing up, we always say we don’t want to be like our parents but we take traits from them without realising and it becomes a part of who you are.

We’re led to believe that life should be a certain way. We grow up with expectations, from our family from tv,films and books. We’re going to marry someone one day, find our prince charming, have kids, house, car, good job and life will be all peachy. But sometimes it doesn’t work out like that and we have to accept what happens or what we’re given. I have a lot of experiences,achievements and memories that I’ll treasure but I want so much more. Mainly to be debt free, own a car again, my own house and be loved by someone, who will enjoy simple things in life, to share things and most of all look out for me and take care of me. Because I don’t think I’m doing a good a job at the moment.

Advertisements

6 thoughts on “‘Find me somebody to love’ & who loves me for me in return

  1. You’ll get there Helen- writing this blog will probably help loads. It might make you more emotional at first to write about things, but it does get it all out. Focus on what you love in life and get counselling session if you need it xxx

  2. I also like running. My favourite way of keeping fit. But I keep getting injured. I’m thinking of swapping to swimming because you’re supposed to be less injury prone. Haven’t got round to it yet.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s